911 Operators

The attitude of recent 911 Operators has made me stop and think before calling them now or in the future.

There is a house in my neighborhood that housed a fugitive from the law. The fugitive fled, but from time to time would come back and go in the house. The policeman who came by and talked to me about it asked that I call, if I saw the person in or near the house.

I saw them. I called 911. By the time the operator had quit playing twenty questions and dispatched police, the person was gone. I was asked by the police to continue to keep an eye on the house and call if the fugitive was seen. So I did. The next time I called, the 911 Operator went through the same set of questions. I can understand needing to know certain things, but I cannot comprehend asking the same questions three times. Can’t they hear? Don’t they believe me? Are they cruel people who somehow “get off” on other’s distress and request for help? But I went through the same insanely repetitive questions and answered, and as before, the fugitive was gone before the police arrived This continued to happen for several more phone calls to 911.

Finally on my fifth or sixth call, I lost my patience. I told the 911 Operator that she was doing what she always did – asking the same questions she already had the answers to over and over and by the time she got all her questions answered repeatedly, the fugitive would be gone as she always was when I called and had to go through this frustrating ordeal with the 911 Operator. She got an ugly attitude with me and I got one back with her.

When the police finally came, it turned out to be someone else going in and out of the house and the police came to me to tell me that they’d gotten a report that I’d spoken very ugly to the 911 operator. ???? Oh, really? Did she also say what she’d said to me?

The policeman said even he got frustrated with 911 operators and their repeated same questions that took up precious time when help could be being sent. But, he said, if he couldn’t do anything about it, he was sure I couldn’t.

A few days later my neighbor down the street was having a very loud argument/fight with her husband. I heard her screaming for someone to call the police. I considered it. I decided someone else could deal with the hateful, deaf, can’t remember a damned thing 911 operator because I’d made my last call to her.

It’s sad when tax dollars pay someone’s salary and it’s agreed that the current protocol isn’t working well – is not efficient, but the consenus is that there’s nothing anyone can do about it.

Donald Trump is right. America used to be a great country. Things like this, when noticed and agreed that they were not working well, would be overhauled. Now Americans just swallow the bitter bile in their throats and say the “Nothing can be done about it” mantra.

Well, I can never call 911 again. Other people can never call 911. If the current method of getting help with serious problems doesn’t work, why should anyone call the deaf, incompetent 911 operator? I seriously do not believe she has to ask the same questions three times. The police said it was standard procedure. It’s standard bullshit is what it is.



Just read an article about why doctors are always running late. It turns out that they schedule 20 minutes per patient, but because most patient visits take more than 20 minutes, they unavoidably always run late seeing you. Hey – genius doctors . . . how about if you see fewer patients and see them for whatever the average time they take to be seen is. You greedily overbook and then want sympathy for running late when YOU cause the problem.

You Can’t Have It All

Women today pride themselves on “having it all”. That means they can have a career, children, a husband, a house . . . all the things they can envision in their lives, they can have.

You can’t blame them for believing this, for it has been fed to them as their right and privilege since the 1970’s. When I was in college, the Feminism Movement was going strong. I remember being in a Speech Class and giving a speech against the movement. It was not met with much agreement.

I remember hearing young women talk about getting their degrees, getting a job, having a husband, a house, a career, children . . . everything! When they would speak with the enthusiasm of youth, I would remember my mother who had to work because she was divorced with two children and no husband still around to help. I’d remember how tired she’d be each day when she’d come in from work. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone. I was in college to get a degree and then to use that degree for a career until I married and began having children. The degree would be there to fall back on, if I found myself divorced or widowed with children. I never wanted to work all day, help children with homework, shop, clean the house and cook meals every week day of my life! I’d see that in action. It was no life to wish on anyone.

Yet, I’d fall on deaf ears when I’d mention the downside to “having it all” as women back then would chant. “Gonna have it all!” They compared themselves to men and a man’s right and expectation to work every day. They were as good as men and they could do that too. The only problem was no one expected a man to drop everything to take care of children. Many women found that they added to their work and burdened themselves with too much to do daily to be able to enjoy any of it.

Over the years I’ve worked with many women who regret “having it all”. I’ve heard many women state that they wish they could stay home with their children. I’ve seen new mothers come into work crying because they had to leave their babies in the care of others so they could come to work. It breaks my heart for them. They are not the ones who insisted, “I can have it all! and I WILL!” as young college students during the 1970’s movement. That was their mothers, or maybe their grandmothers who jumped on that band wagon. I feel sorrow for them just as I felt it for my poor mother who worked all day and was exhausted all night.

You can’t have it all. You can choose which you want and then stick to it. Men never had it all. Men never got to sit around someone’s kitchen table drinking coffee  with a neighbor while on a break from housework . To me, that was “having it all”. Women were there when the children came home from school. They were there during the day to wash the clothes and clean the house. Women today have to fit those activities into times when they are not at work. I’ve heard of mothers saying they washed clothes during the night . . . I’ve heard them talk about “stumbling to the washer/dryer” at three in the morning.

No one should expect to have it all. That’s what choices are for. The women’s movement did make it more acceptable for women to work alongside men in the workforce. It opened up some career opportunities to women. However, I do not believe it made most women’s lives better. I’ve worked with them. I’ve seen what their lives are filled with today and it is not happiness at “having it all”.

I wish young women and older ones who encouraged their naive belief in having it all in the 1970’s, had listened to people like me and speeches like Sam Ervin’s. The lives of women today might be easier, if the excited women from the 1970’s had asked themselves what having it all was going to really look like. I knew. I’d seen it . . . day after day after day in a working mother. Having it all is not something to aspire to. Choosing what you want to have is.